Being Part of the Group, K&L Style

Be who you are and say how you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind. - Dr Seuss

I had been a respected and contributing member of a group, the church. But it was a well known fact that if any weakness or failure appeared in someone, they would be rejected outright without compunction. That was the expected norm and obviously my own experience. To assume Christians would rally around someone in trouble was a naive and fictitious dream.    

One of my jobs was to field calls for the sales reps. They spent most of their time on the phone talking to various shops around the country, selling products and in their words. "shooting the shit". I took lots of messages for callbacks.  One day, a guy wanted to talk to his sales rep now and began screaming at me. I could have hung up the phone but didn't. He ended his rant with, "You got that, cunt?"

I dropped the receiver in shock. No one had ever called me such a vile name before and I began to cry. My nerves were still so jagged that I could not stop. People began to notice. The sales manager eventually called me into the company owner's office and I followed, still crying, convinced that I was about to be fired.

Instead, they sat me down and asked who was on the phone. Then I was told to repeat exactly what he said to me. Still sobbing I told them. When I got to the cunt part both men flinched. The owner angrily asked who the sales rep was and Jon was brought in for questioning. The sales manager asked him what this customer was like.

Glancing over at me, still in tears, Jon said, "He's an asshole."

After dismissing him the owner said, "We don't need people like that." The manager nodded and they both looked at me. "Pull yourself together and go back to work." I scooted, relieved to still have my job. The entire building was strangely quiet for the rest of the day.

The next morning I was met by the front office receptionist who excitedly told me they had dropped that shop from their customer base. Jon had called and told him directly. At that moment another sales rep emerged from the smoky salesroom..

"Hey cunt!" My eyes got big and my lips began to quiver. He boomed out laughing, clapped me on the shoulder, and walked away. Soon another rep called me cunt. And another. It went on and on all day long. These guys were demonstrating their own brand of camaraderie by trying to toughen me up. It worked like a charm. After being called cunt about three hundred times that day I can honestly say, vile speech has zero power to hurt me. Later on while passing out messages in the salesroom there were a few choice comments.

"We don't need fucking assholes in this business."

"No one talks to our girls that way. Only we can!" Laughter.

Since they worked on commission, I was concerned about Jon losing money. "Nah," he said. "He didn't do much business anyways. Plus, now I don't have to talk to that asshole again."

It was official. The guy was an asshole.

My burden felt lighter after that day.